Sex minus Foreplay

We know that every advice column has attempted to drill into men’s heads that the No. 1 thing women want in bed is foreplay, foreplay, foreplay. But AskMen is going to contradict those teachings. Believe it or not, there are occasions when a woman doesn’t need the big build-up and wants to get straight to the main event. These are the times when the requisite foreplay can be skipped because she’s ready to get down to business immediately.

After a night out

The two of you have been out on the town together and had a great time. You enjoyed a few cocktails. You either joined her on the dance floor or, if you’re one of those non-dancing guys, you sat and watched her shake it with her girlfriends. The environment was giddy and sexy the way only a sweaty nightclub full of half-drunk people can be. On such a night, foreplay is not necessary. She’s probably been thinking about having sex with you all night. When you finally step in the door, she’ll be tearing your clothes off before you can make it to the bedroom.

Welcome home sex

Whether it’s a business trip, a family visit or a holiday that separates the two of you, when you are forced to spend time apart, the homecoming will be sweet. The time away from each other has made not only her heart grow fonder but her libido, as well. When you’re picking her up at the airport or vice versa, you can be pretty certain that the sex is going to be fast and furious when you get back home. She has missed you a lot, so she’s not going to stand on formality once you’re finally in the same room.

In public

Not everyone is into getting busy in public, but if your girl has an exhibitionist side or just gets off on the possibility of getting caught, this kind of sex doesn’t require foreplay. First of all, public sex will usually be rather quick to lessen the chances that someone will catch you. It also generally takes place in locations that aren’t foreplay-friendly -- a bathroom stall isn’t the place for romance. If she’s into having sex in the back of a cinema or upstairs at a dinner party, there’s a good chance that the thought of it has already gotten her excited, so foreplay is not required.


After attending a wedding or bridal shower

Weddings and bridal showers do strange things to women. You may notice that when your girlfriend comes home from attending one of these events, she is more enthusiastic than usual in bed. This usually happens for one of two reasons: 1) The type of woman who has no plans to get married will want to have hot sex with you to celebrate the fact that she’s not saddled with a husband and kids; and 2) If your girlfriend is the marrying kind, she may want to get down to business to prove that unbridled passion will still be on the table once you commit to her. Either way, wedding bells can be a major aphrodisiac and will often make foreplay superfluous.

Short on time

Contrary to what you may think, being short on time is not a reason to not have sex. You may believe that women would prefer to avoid it altogether rather than do it without foreplay, but chances are, if she’s in the mood, she’ll be fine with squeezing it in before you go to work, during your lunch break or on other occasions when time is scarce. Quickies have their place in every sexual repertoire. Just be sure not to make a habit of it.

the exception, not the rule

This article is not designed to give you a license to forgo foreplay for the rest of time. On a regular basis, kissing, touching, licking, sucking, caressing, and nibbling are appreciated and expected. But keep in mind that occasions will arise when a good, hard f**k is what a girl really wants.

Mistakes Women Make During Sex ( Part 2 )

Going to bed in stretch pajamas

A big mistake most women make is going to bed in their stretch pajamas, thinking that it is not so important what to wear at night. This get-up is for sure a passion-killer. So, Ladies, when you go to sleep put on sexy lingerie, your beloved will appreciate it.

Lying without movement and thinking of a new dress.

Most women believe that sex is only pleasing for a man, and they have to lie without movement, thinking of a new dress that they saw in a shop, while their poor man tries to get some reaction. Lying in the bed like a dead body is a real turn-off for a man. Don’t view sex as a duty; enjoy it with your man.

Making him responsible for your orgasm

Stop doing it. His duty isn't just to make you reach orgasm, don't be so self-loving. If you know what can make you reach orgasm, tell it to your man. He is not a mind-reader.

Unshaved legs

Don’t expect you man always be clean-shaved when going to bed, when you legs are so prickly that scratch his shins. Shave your legs and apply a powder or a moisturizing cream so he doesn’t think he is trying to get out from an Amazon Jungle.

Sleeping in his arms means that he loves you.

After sex women like to talk and cuddle, while men like to sleep. It is something biological and not intentionally. And what’s that desire to sleep in his arms. Try to put your head on your arm and see what you will feel after a while. Do you feel comfortable? Your arms grew numb. So, next time don’t think that he doesn’t love you because he doesn't want you to sleep in his arms.

Ashamed to undress in front of him.

Don’t be ashamed to undress in front of your man, as men like to look at their woman body and feast upon their beauty. Don’t deprive your man from this pleasure!

Forgetting about man.

Often women are so concerned with foreplay, enjoying men’s touches and caress that forget that their man might also like to be touched and caressed. Make sure you don’t forget about your man, you are not the one who needs to be pleased. Ask what you man likes and do it.

Being too hygienic.

Probably the main reason that kills the desire for sex is when a woman leaves her man in passion and rushes to the bathroom to wash and change the sheets. Leave all that cleaning when he is gone or shower together, it will spice up you too.

As you can see women also are capable to make mistakes during sex. So, Ladies if you want to make you sex life better, avoid these most common mistakes.

Mistakes Women Make During Sex (Part 1)

Men are not the only one who make mistakes during sex, women also do them. When in a relationship appear problems the both partners are guilty, the thing is that someone initiates them and another continues.
Below are listed some of the most common mistakes women make during sex.
Ladies be honest you do it.

He must do the first move.

Women always believe that man is a hunter and therefore he must make the first move. But ladies men will be absolutely over the moon if you start sex and make the fist move. Most of them dream about this, but women don’t want to break the old sexual traditions, expecting men do first move. They may wait weeks, craving for their man, but will don’t do the first move.

Worrying about their look.

Many women are worrying about their look during sex, forgetting about what they are really doing at present. Paying attention on how you look will distract you from what you're actually supposed to be doing. Men don’t care about little cellulite dimples on your thighs, or that you gain 300 grams of weight. The only thing they want is to know that you enjoy it and have fun.

Stating that men are not romantic.

Most of women think that men can’t be romantic. But they are capable to be romantic and make you feel like a queen. Only don’t ask him for thousands of times to make you a romantic dinner, as such things are not done against order.

Thinking that men want only sex.

The reason of this thinking is hidden in men, as they painted themselves in this way. But in fact it is not true, because men also suffer from low libido when they are stressed or tired. They even can be not in the mood, when it comes to football or their favorite computer game. In case a man doesn’t want sex, woman will think that he doesn’t love her anymore, but love has nothing to do with sex.

A man knows everything about sex.

Just because he is a man it doesn’t mean that he is an expert in this area. If you not tell him that you don’t like some of his moves during sex, he will continue doing it. Communication is what makes relationship strong and successful. Talk to your partner about sex, say what you like and what you would not like to do during sex.

Being scared to try something new.

Women usually are afraid to try something new in their sex life. In case a man offers to his woman to try a new position it doesn’t mean that he is not interested in her anymore. He only tries to make their sex life diversified and interesting. If you don’t want to do what he offers talk to him.

How to Make your Ex-Boyfriend Jealous

There may be many reasons you want to make your ex-boyfriend jealous. Some of them may be good and some of them could be really bad. Almost all of them are sure to be immature and petty. But the broken heart wants what it wants. Who cares about being good and righteous when you can be evil and get even? All the pop psychology aside, sometimes it’s therapeutic to make an ex jealous. Something vindictive about having him regret not being with you. So, take a deep breath as we indulge our darker side...

1. The best revenge, they say, is to live well. As vague as that is, it’s pretty clear that if you are happy with your current situation in life, it means that your life is a lot better without your ex. Be happy with your life and life’s choices. Make your peace with your current situation and be content. True happiness shows on your face, through your smile and your laughter.

2. Do not stop working, exercising and hanging out with friends, especially common friends. You need to continue your routine to stay sane. Also, hanging out with common friends will only help your cause. They can act as indirect messengers between you and your ex-boyfriend.

3. Do not post depressing status messages on Facebook. Do not tweet that you’re now broken hearted. This will appear too contrived and sad. Do post standard and mundane messages about work or studies. Another option is posting updates about music, movies you watched, clubs that you went to, etc.

4. Always look your best. Even if you step out to buy tangerines or cereal, look good. You don’t have to wear your Sunday best, but be groomed. Even if you’re casually dressed, do not be frazzled and sloppy. When you leave your house, ask yourself if you want to look like this if your ex-boyfriend runs into you? Would this look be good enough to make him regret his decision?

5. Hang out with one of your guy friends to make your ex-boyfriend jealous. Not more than one. It could be viewed as desperate. If you have a friend that your ex was always jealous of, half your work is done. Do not be over-flirtatious; however, you can be affectionate and warm.

6. If you run into your ex, be very casual. Act like you would if you ran into a casual friend of the opposite gender. Answer everything he asks in a matter-of-fact manner. Talk about exams, college, etc. Anything mundane and routine that isn’t indicative of your heartache is good. If you are asked “How you doing?”, say that you’re doing well. Respond naturally and in the way you would to an acquaintance or even a stranger. Don’t look sad or forlorn.

7. Do not do stuff that would be perceived as familiar. For example, if a song is playing, don’t proclaim that you remember how much your ex loves this song. If he sniffles, don’t ask him if the allergy is still acting up. Do not comment on things like new haircuts, clothes, etc., even if that’s the first thing you notice.

8. Look distracted and keep checking the time. Always leave before him and say you’re late. Implying that you’re late for something is a great way of signing off. Do not elaborate what you’re late for.

9. Don’t ever be hostile or indifferent. This reeks of the fact that you are still not over him. If you smile and act like running into him hasn’t affected you, your ex will get the message that you don’t care.

10. Don’t ask your ex-boyfriend about immediate or long term plans. Don’t ask “What you doing tonight?” or “What plans for the weekend?”. Once you banish curiosity, you will be able to show your ex that you don’t care about his life and you have truly moved on. Asking your ex if he has seen a certain movie or play will be considered a hint. Ditto about concerts, recitals, art shows, etc. Do not make any indication of wanting to hang out with him. The same applies to bigger decisions such as which college or university he plans to go to.

11. If you’re seeing someone new, call him when your ex-boyfriend is around. Don’t raise your voice but mumble sweet nothings. Be barely audible. Your body language and smile should indicate that you’re having a flirty conversation. If your ex asks about him, be terse and to the point. Say that he is really fun to hang out with and end the conversation at that. It will kill your ex if you’re having fun with someone new!

12. You could also subtly flirt with someone when you know your ex is watching. Do not be over-flirtatious in a cheap and desperate way. Saying a line here and a little eye contact there should be enough. Don’t make too much of physical contact. Touch the shoulder or arm slightly while talking, but not in a gross way. Choose someone special to shower your attention on. Do not flirt with everyone. Having just one object of affection seems credible.

13. Do fun things like take a fishing trip with your friends or go clubbing. Be sure to mention this to a friend who will convey this to your ex. Your ex will hate it that you have an independent life beyond him.

If you want to make your ex-boyfriend jealous just to get back at him, you could use one or many of these tips. However, if you want to win your ex-boyfriend back, be careful with certain things like flirting with someone new or being seen with someone new. Seeing you with someone new could act as a catalyst and help your ex move on. So, figure out your agenda before beginning the exercise.

Understand that making your ex-boyfriend jealous will either make you feel vindicated or content, but only temporarily. In order to move on or to get together with your ex again, you will have to banish negative emotions and bring in the positive ones. Whatever your agenda, you can indulge your broken heart and do things that make you feel better at that moment. However, draw the line when it gets obsessive and out of control.

Use All Five Senses to Spice up Your Sex Life

Don't fall into a routine, doing always the same things. Switch on your imagination and put all your senses into action. Use these five senses and you will be guaranteed with new and exciting discoveries.

Seeing

It is very romantic when a bedroom is filled with a faint light. Turn the lights on and you will be agreeably surprised at how your partner’s body looks like. Light the candles as they create a romantic atmosphere.

Or you may have sex during the day, in natural light. According to studies morning sex is very healthy. Being ‘visually appealing’ doesn’t mean that you have to be completely naked, keep some clothes on you. Buy some sexy lingerie and seduce your partner.

Another way to spice up your sex is to blindfold you partner. It will heighten your awareness of other sensations. Many couples state that being blindfolded during sex is something unforgettable. Being blindfolded your partner will do not know what you are going to do next. This will arouse you and your partner greatly.

Hearing

Make a play list of you favorite sexy music, as a right play list may create the exactly right mood. Choose music that has a private meaning for you both. Try playing various types of music during sex. See if there are some changes.

Dirty talk, in case you both like it will never be out of place, as it creates a sexy and exciting atmosphere. Talk to you partner, tell what you like and love to do. Only make sure not to let all this dirty talk get too out of your hand. As evidently you don’t want to find all of fourth floor’s ears leaned against your door.

Taste

Go out somewhere to eat with your partner or cook a favorite meal as a prelude. But make sure to not eat too much as indigestion and heartburn are unsexy things. Hand feed each other, do it in a sensual manner, make you partner crave for more.

If you want to a have a really fantastic sex, use edible body lotions, whipped cream, or lick-able fragrances. Don’t be afraid to be playful. Use your imagination and have fun! Only keep in mind any allergies that you or your partner may have.

Smell

According to a research, sexual attraction is significantly based on smell. Conversely, an unpleasant smell is enough to spurn someone, no matter how beautiful you are. Women take more attention on smells than men, so guys be always good smelling and make sure your bedroom is clean.

Use small amounts of your favorite perfume and spray a little on your bed sheets.

Touch

Our skin can be probably compared with a gold mine of hidden erogenous zones that make you shiver when touched. Make sure to not touch one and the same zone each time you have sex. There are so many G-spots and so many ways to touch them as: massaging, licking, circling, light touching and etc.

Not touching can also be an unforgettable sensory experience. An easy way to drive you partner crazy is doing a striptease or exotic dance. You may even use a feather to arouse you partner or whatever else fires your imagination.

Sex and Marriage: How to be a better lover?

Most people expect that the intensity of their sex lives will fade after they marry. Some guys even resign themselves to never having good sex again after deciding to spend the rest of their lives with one woman. But this doesn’t have to be the case; marriage doesn’t necessarily mean the death of hot sex, but it will take some effort from both of you to keep it steamy as the years go by. Here are some tips for having better sex as a married couple.

Use sex to get past ruts in your marriage

There will be times in your marriage when careers, family, kids, friends, hobbies and other important tasks will pack your schedule and get in the way of maintaining a good relationship. There will be periods when the two of you are not communicating well and don’t seem to be connecting with each other. When you experience these ruts in your relationship, don’t let sex go by the wayside.

Use the time you have together wisely by getting frisky. If your marriage is experiencing a dip, it’ll fall even further if the two of you don’t connect sexually. Instead of abandoning your bedroom activities at the first sign of trouble, use sex to get back on track.

Stop looking at her as your wife

Yes, she is the love of your life -- the woman you chose to spend your days with until you both grow old. She is the mother of your children (if you have them) and a domestic goddess that runs your household and your family while still succeeding in a career and a myriad of other duties.

In order to make married sex better, try to stop thinking of her as your adorable and adoring wife when the two of you get frisky. Allow your imagination to run wild; think of her as a dirty sexpot and encourage her to play the part. Tap into the intense attraction you have for each other and forget that you’re husband and wife.

Make your room a no kid zone

Having a better sex life with your wife requires that you both take a step away from your everyday lives and focus on each other. If you are parents, this means that you’re going to have to designate some space in your house for adult-only activities. To this end, consider making your bedroom a no-go area for your children.

The kids usually have the run of the house, but if they know that mum and dad’s room is off limits, you’ll be more likely to have time and space to yourselves on a regular basis. Your bedroom will become a haven where it’s all about the two of you.

Don’t wear pyjamas

It’s a well-known fact that many people -- men and women alike -- feel it’s OK to let themselves go once the wedding vows are exchanged. Unfortunately, this is a one way street to problems with your sex life. If you no longer bother to put in the effort to make yourself attractive to your spouse, she could lose interest in being intimate with you.

Keep the sex hot by maintaining your looks. This means no flannel pyjamas in bed. Slip under the sheets wearing what she thinks you look sexy in, whether it’s the t-shirt she loves to cuddle up to, just your boxers or nothing at all. Don’t come to bed covered up from head to toe. Hopefully this will encourage her to put some imagination into her sleepwear as well.

The best thing about married sex

The major benefit of having sex in a long-term relationship is that you should be able to trust your partner and not be afraid to share all aspects of your sexuality with her. Get your fantasies out in the open, push your boundaries and create the right environment in order to keep exploring sex with the woman you plan to grow old with.

The object of your affection is your ‘best’ friend?

Love. That four letter word that brings so much happiness, so much heartache..but is still so worthwhile. Friendship. That wonderful bonding, that incomparable rush of emotion that cuts across age, race, gender, religion and region. But what happens if you combine the two? Falling in love is complicated enough, so what happens if the object of your affection is your ‘best’ friend?

Friendship blossoming into love is actually a rather common phenomenon. No wonder, considering that friendship is usually built on the platforms of mutual affection, unconditional support, or common interests, backgrounds or circumstances, similar to those that love is built on. Moreover, friends support each other through thick and thin, the good times and the bad and the ups and downs that make up life. Very similar therefore, to the qualities that make up a good mate.

In this context, all it takes is a small spark, to ignite the gentle glow of friendship to the full on flame of passion.

There are many advantages in falling for your best bud. For one, you zip past the 'downside' of dating: Remember the sweaty palms and awkward silences of your first date? Or the constant pressure to present your ‘best’ side? When you're in a romantic relationship with your best friend, you get to relax and just enjoy each other’s company. What’s more, you need not shield those skeletons in your closet 'cause chances are, your friend knows about all of them and loves and accepts you anyway.

However such a situation has a serious downside as well. For example, what if your friend does not share your feelings? What if he/she is so disgusted at your amorous affections that he/she can never look at you the same way again? Or what if things simply don’t work out? These are some serious pitfalls to what might otherwise seem an idyllic scenario. The key question amidst all of this uncertainty is: Is declaring your love to your best friend worth risking the friendship? Tough question but one that definitely needs to be confronted before you take any course of action.

Going forward, the main question is how to broach such a sensitive topic. Will the direct approach of being completely blunt about your feelings be the best approach? Or will the subtle, gradual approach of carefully dropping hints over a certain span of time, be better? Naturally, in matters of the heart there can be no hard and fast rules or foolproof formulae. What’s more, the most important thing while in such a delicate situation is to exercise caution and employ all the sensitivity possible to ensure that things go according to plan.

Here are some helpful tips to keep in mind when dealing with such a dilemma:

1.Assess the situation with a clear head
Although this line of approach may seem pretty much next to impossible when you look at your situation, objectively assessing the situation can make all the difference. Clearly think and list down (preferably in writing) what exactly you feel and expect from the situation. Proceeding without thinking things through can mean making some avoidable mistakes that you might regret later.

2.Prepare yourself for anything
Telling your best friend that you have feelings for him/her means putting your friendship on the line. Perhaps, your friend may return your feelings and the two of you can embark on a romantic relationship. But what if your friend rejects you and wants to continue being strictly friends? You need to be ready to accept whatever the outcome.

3.Test the waters
Observe your friend carefully, (though covertly). Is he/she emotionally available to you? Is he/she interested in someone else or simply ‘off’ love? You will have to judge to the best of your knowledge whether or not your friend is ready to take your friendship to the next level.

4.Time your move
In life, everything is about timing. When you make your move is as crucial as how you make it. Don’t spring your feelings to your friend during a rough work week or a family emergency. Instead, ensure that the object of your affection is in a receptive frame of mind before you proceed further.

5.Make your move
Use your imagination. A wise man once said "Love is all about the grand gestures". Thing big. Think personal. Express your feelings in a manner that encapsulates your feelings in all their spendour. Go that extra mile - it's sure to be worth it in the end.

6.Face the consequences
Accept both victory and defeat with grace. If your friend responds positively - take things slow and savor each moment of your time together. If he/she turns you down, preserve the friendship. Just because you two can’t have romantic love together, doesn’t mean you have to throw away the friendship.

Ultimately, remember whatever the outcome of your ‘coming clean’, come what may, you will always have precious memories of your time together to cherish forever!